Yes, I'll admit it...I love Kelly Clarkson. Okay, glad I got that out of my system. We won't mention it again.
Ah, another great story about the classy side of Miami. It must be the humidity. Actually, apparently it must be the marijuana...
"Anyone who grew up in the suburbs knows that the mall parking lot is the perfect place to meet your dealer and pick up a dime bag (maybe we're revealing too much). But you never think that the weed may actually be coming from the mall.
Things are a bit different in Miami, though, now that cops have discovered a hydroponic marijuana nursery hidden in a Mall of the Americas' storeroom. By tapping into the building's power supply, growers were able to hook up enough grow lights to cultivate over 200 budding plants. Authorities say the crude wiring could have caused a fire, but they haven't made any arrests and aren't revealing how they discovered the doobage.
"That's bad. I don't want my kids around that. Bro, that's a first," said eloquent shopper Fonsy Martinez. We're with you, Fonz.
While police are presumably investigating mall employees and maintenance workers, we've got our eye on the owner of the food court Chick-fil-A. He clearly reaps the benefits when there's a mall-wide outbreak of the munchies."
Thank you, Miami. Thank you for continuing to make me smile...in shame.
I don't even really drink Coca-Cola without rum or Johnny Walker, but it still makes me happy. Just thinking about those polar bears, come on, when I was a kid I wanted to move the arctic (my mom said no). Although my sister is always careful to remind me that "they originally made it with cocaine, that's why it's called Coke." I know, I know...they definitely should have stuck with the first recipe. At any rate, go design your own bottle at http://www.coca-cola.com/.
That's mine. Good times.
Amazing what a flat iron and orthodontics can do. Chelsea Clinton, I know I'm a little late, but congratulations on making it through puberty, becoming quasi-hot, and getting some hot European ass. I commend you, as well as Bill Clinton's genepool.
Last but not least, although the thought of actually consuming these (without being on drugs) makes me physically ill, I can't help but appreciate the idea.
The Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburger
Served exclusively at the Google NYC cafeteria.
Burger King's The Burger