Showing posts with label fried food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fried food. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Dangerously delicious...

Warning: Do not eat the following product on an empty stomach...and especially not for breakfast.



And if you do make the mistake of consuming said product in either of the preformentioned conditions, do not, I repeat do NOT flush the internal fire with water. The burning of your stomach lining will only become worse.

That being said, once the hole in my small intestine heals, I plan to finish the bag.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Being Fat doesn't pay...but Fat People DO!

Sweet Home Alabama! Home of great barbeque, fried chicken, sweet tea, and obesity. You have to respect a state where deep frying is pretty much the only method of cooking, gravy is considered a beverage, and pecan pie is used as a digestive aid. Joking aside, Alabama has become the second most obese state in the country (behind Mississipi, the reigning gold medalist for the past 3 years), and it's time to crack down. Well, slim down. Well, slim down on crack...and I'm not talking narcotics. With just over 30% of it's population considered obese, state officials are finally recognizing and addressing the condition as a serious statewide health problem.



Legislation has been passed declaring that beginning in January 2010, obese state workers will be required to pay $25 a month for health insurance(which is normally provided at no cost). This will ensure that any obese employee who has not made an effort to lose weight by the January deadline, will be throwing away $300 a year, and I'm sure 'fat fees' are not tax deductible.

I can't speak for anyone else, but I'd rather buy a new iphone than spend my hard earned money on being decidedly unhealthy, something that carries far more risks than squeezing a few more hundred dollars out of your piggy bank.


Of course a lot of Alabama residents are in uproar (I'll let you guess which ones), but the state already requires $24 a month from smokers, and obesity is equally as much of a health risk. I'm impressed that the government is finally taking a proactive stance to help diminish this unnecessary disease which is also becoming prevalent in children at a young age.


Kudos Alabama! But seriously, this doesn't mean you need to get rid of the barbeque...

Thursday, August 14, 2008

The Phelps Diet.

If you're looking for the next diet craze...











Don't look here.





Olympic Gold Medalist Swimmer Michael Phelps eats 12,000 calories a day, more than the average person should eat in an entire week. And a typical day looks like this:





Breakfast: Three fried-egg sandwiches loaded with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, fried onions and mayonnaise. Two cups of coffee. One five-egg omelet. One bowl of grits. Three slices of French toast topped with powdered sugar. Three chocolate-chip pancakes.





Lunch: One pound of enriched pasta. Two large ham and cheese sandwiches with mayo on white bread. Energy drinks packing 1,000 calories.






Dinner: One pound of pasta. An entire pizza. More energy drinks.









Mmmm. Chocolate-chip pancakes. I might take up swimming...or just get fat.